It’s pretty wild how my emotional state oscillates from elation and utter optimism on some days, to despair, defeat and depression on others. I’m in one of the latter episodes right now.

It’s been about 10 days, I reckon. And I blame it on my last two physio appointments. Last week’s was a real grind, and I was exhausted for the rest of the day. Productive, yes, but brutal.

I anticipated more of the same this week and got what I expected. Again, it was “good” in that we got things moving around a bit more and did lots of useful strengthening and range-of-motion activities. But the BDR vaso-restriction device on my thigh for 4 sets of 15 single-leg leg presses was seriously uncomfortable, not to mention all the other low-lights I’ve talked about before.

This week’s rehab cooked my right glute to go along with my tight right calf and the ever-present 3/10 chronic pain in my knee (which ramps up to a solid 5-6/10 at night), so I’ve been feeling really dumpy as a result. Walking is harder because of the soreness and fatigue. I reckon my attitude sucks a bit more than usual too.

And once again, in these depths of my despair, I wonder if it will ever get better. I don’t see relief or a light at the end of the tunnel.

Oh, of interest, I got called for jury duty in August. I’m tickled to be asked, but it does make me think about having to wear pants instead of shorts and how that will feel, not to mention sitting for extended periods of time. Maybe I’ll be excused.